A year of change
Congratulations to us all! Tomorrow, March 2, will mark our 1-year-anniversary with me as your called pastor. Time to celebrate! And yet, I am so tired after this past crazy year. No, it’s not you all who tire me out. Don’t worry. It’s this looong pandemic. The uncertainty. And it’s the hope. Seriously, I feel like the light at the end of the tunnel, the vaccine so many of you by now already got, suddenly stopped my adrenaline refill. Like when you get sick on your first day of vacation because your body just knows it’s ok. That’s how I feel these days. Not sick, but tired out in the face of hope that soon life will be more social again, more personal, less fearful.
The other day, someone gifted me bean bag refill material. Eagerly, I unpacked our older bean bag to refill it. I turned it and turned it, but there was no zipper to find. I turned it more, just because I couldn’t believe it. Then, I got a scissor and cut parts of the thread. I thought, put the opening of the refill bag into our bean bag – and made a huge mess. Beads spilled everywhere. It took me 15 minutes, burning thighs from standing in that position “my” body-workout-trainer on YouTube usually finishes and a lot more spilling, until the bean bag was refilled. Then, I stitched the hole up and put it back into its cover. It looks the same as before. But it’s so much more comfortable again!
Being a good pastor, I couldn’t but help to think of this refill like something we need these days. After a year of change and anxieties due to uncertainty and more change in our world and country. During this second season of Lent during Covid. And I started thinking of myself like an old bean bag that needs a refill (which is really not the worst thing to be; it’s comfy, everyone loves it.) And maybe I need to cut something open to having the Holy Spirit access my soul and heart like a waterfall of white polystyrene beads. And probably, it will be a mess. And to most people, I will look just like I always did. But inside, I will be renewed, refilled, refreshed.
That’s what I wish you all this season: to cut your soul open to be refilled with the Holy Spirit.
Through prayer, through walks, through breathing and letting go and taking on and whatever it is for you. The Holy Spirit will know what to do!
Your Pastor Tia!
